Reference no: EM131123142

Problem and Purpose Statements (Obj. 2)

Your Task. Identify a problem in your current job or a previous job, such as inadequate use of technology, inefficient procedures, spotty customer service, poor product quality, low morale, or a personnel problem. Assume your boss agrees with your criticism and asks you to prepare a report. Write (a) a two- or three-sentence statement describ- ing the problem, (b) a problem question, and (c) a simple statement of purpose for your report.

11.6 Plagiarism, Paraphrasing, and Citing Sources (Obj. 6)

One of the biggest problems of student writers is paraphrasing sec- ondary sources correctly to avoid plagiarism.

Your Task. For each of the following, read the original passage. Analyze the paraphrased version. List the weaknesses in relation to what you have learned about plagiarism and the use of references. Then write an improved version.

a. Original Passage

Developing casual online game titles can be much less risky than trying to create a game that runs on a console such as an Xbox.

Casual games typically cost less than $200,000 to produce, and pro- duction cycles are only six months to a year. There's no shelf space, packaging, or CD production to pay for. Best of all, there's more room for innovation.17

Paraphrased Passage

The development of casual online games offers less risk than creat- ing games running on Xbox and other consoles. Usually, casual games are cheaper, costing under $200,000 to create and six to twelve months to produce. Developers save on shelf space, packag- ing, and CD production too. Moreover, they have more freedom to innovate.

b. Original Passage

The collapse in the cost of computing has made cellular commu- nication economically viable. Worldwide, one in two new phone subscriptions is cellular. The digital revolution in telephony is most advanced in poorer countries because they have been able to skip the outdated technological step of relying on landlines.

Paraphrased Passage

The drop in computing costs now makes cellular communication affordable around the world. In fact, one out of every two new phones is cellular. The digital revolution in cellular telephones is developing faster in poorer countries because they could skip the outdated technological process of using landlines (Henderson 44).

c. Original Passage

Search site Yahoo kept world news prominent on its front page because users feel secure knowing that it is easily accessible, even if they don't often click it. Conspicuous placement also went to enter- tainment, which draws heavy traffic from people seeking a diver- sion at work. By contrast, seemingly work-related content such as finance gets ample use in the evening when people pay bills and manage personal portfolios.18

Paraphrased Passage

Search giant Yahoo kept news prominent on its portal since its cus- tomers feel good knowing it is there, even though they don't read it much. Such noticeable placement was also used for entertain- ment news that attracts heavy traffic from users searching for a dis- traction at work. As opposed to that, what may seem work related, such as finance, is much visited at night when people pay their bills and manage their portfolios.

d. Original Passage

The bid to offer more fashionable apparel was a bid for Target's business. With designer names and fashion flair, Target has made customers comfortable buying dental floss and flirty dresses under one giant, uber-hip roof. . . . Wal-Mart found out that though its edgier Metro7 line for women sold well in several hundred stores, the line's skinny jeans and other higher-style fashions bombed when the company expanded it to 3,000 stores.19

Paraphrased Passage

By offering more fashionable clothes, Wal-Mart was bidding for Target's business. With fashion flair and designer names, Target had attracted customers who would buy dental floss and sexy dresses under one roof. Wal-Mart learned that its hip Metro7 line

for women sold well in hundreds of stores, but the skinny jeans and higher-style clothes misfired when the retailer took them to 3,000 of its stores.