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Classmate post for History of My Misfortunes
The title of this story, Historia Calamitatum or "The History of My Misfortunes" justifiably asserts what Abelard believes has happened to him, almost like just being at the wrong place at the wrong time. You can see in his letter the excitement he has for secular studies and the emergence of philosophy in the time period which he believes in greatly. However, he never puts God aside, he believes in God, but also he realizes that reason seems to work well to explain why things are the way they are. You can feel the division and frustration that he contains inside him. I believe by not entitling the piece as a love story or such, he is basically being sympathetic toward himself and for others to read; he feels that he has been unjustly wronged and that he is essentially a martyr like Christ. At the same time, he knows that he has gone against God in trying to meddle in understanding and he believes himself justly punished for it. It seems like he is very held back in his writing and tries to use philosophical reasoning in the letter rather than complete emotion to understand his circumstances.
Abelard even shows that he is able to outwit the other clergymen and that really the only reason he is persecuted is because he is right and it diminishes their teachings. Heloise is only briefly noted in the whole letter towards the middle and the letter is geared much more towards surmising his shame and persecution for what he has done in life. He even announces that he feels more ashamed than the pain of being castrated. It is interesting to note how many times he references theology and quotes from religious figures in the letter, showing that it is indeed a world now beginning to be mixed between secular and theological studies. Near the closing of the letter, Abelard really seems to have found an audience who are interested in his teachings, yet because the world is they way it is at the time, there is no way he can get away with his teachings without being punished and so the Bishop makes him burn his own book.
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